BEING REAL IN AN UNREAL WORLD
Norman Rockwell, Girl at Mirror
The world we see is not the real world. To recognize its splendour we must first come to terms with our own, beneath and beyond the numerous filters we use to apprise all we perceive. Our judgement is at best “fickle”, adjusting endlessly to fit into one or another definition of reality. We know when we are not being real and secretly, many of us wish there was a way through into a truer life.
We long for authenticity as a state of being that is not qualified by what we do or how we appear. We long to live it.
It begins with the desire to be and have more than what the material world can offer. The longing grows to mammoth proportions, instilling a dissatisfaction that far from being negative awakens an ardent yearning for expression and greater sharing. Women tend to confuse this longing with love and partnership, men with competence and renown. However it manifests, it escapes every one who looks for it in the outside world.
When the moment comes and we feel that craving, something in us knows beyond doubt that there IS a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. Like first love, we will leave everything for it. Nothing less will do.
Striving to be genuine then leaves us with something of a puzzle. Being real does not mean we forfeit the desire to play, but how and with whom? What to do or not do? How to “be” in a world that seems increasingly artificial and unfulfilling? Carefully at first, we unlearn the way of the automaton and learn to walk a tightrope on a path that is razor sharp and tricky. Will we lose the affection and the comfort of all that we have worked for? What is going to happen in that great “out there” where nothing is predictable?
So we turn within to find a quality and space that is wholly ours, without interference from the outside world. We discover a depth that lies beyond what may be seen. Keenly, we begin to distinguish that innermost space from the other one covering it, where feelings and physical reactions play havoc. This inner space harbours us and is uniquely ours; to reach it we must navigate uncharted oceans beyond fear, without disconnecting from the material world.
We live in a society founded on opposition where even the most outrageous rebels fit right in with the sheep. Being real in an unreal world, is not just challenging, it is anguishing and complicated. It implies that we unlearn the very attitudes and behaviour that allow us to go unnoticed, be comfortable, and feel secure within borrowed beliefs, imposed norms, and hand-me-down expectations that forge our identity.
Being real requires we take a deep and serious look at the way we express ourselves in the world and the nature of the meanings we attribute to it. It is a frustrating, complicated, upsetting art of retraining perception, changing paradigms, and looking out through windows of perception that arise unexpectedly.
Our world gradually changes and we attract what we begin to live, and find the support of individuals who have walked a little farther. They tend a balancing hand, lovingly steering us away from our habitual drifting, all the while careful not to dictate our moves or condition us. In authenticity, our actions are always and wholly our own, emanating from that inner space where being flourishes.
Nobody can tell us it is easy but if you feel it, if you have begun to hanker for it, you already know that it is a glorious expedition into a Reality that is majestic beyond the imagination of this world.
